When do we say enough is enough! - Ye pyar na hoga kam

It is heartening to see that Hindi serials have taken it upon themselves to question the many old and often harmful notions that continue to plague modern India. Be it child marriage, the stigma attached to widow remarriages, female infanticide, the helpless conditions of poor farmer who are forced to sell their children, almost all the serious subjects are being covered. There are serials whose main pivots are these sensitive and topical issues. However there are other shows that are trying to do their bit by weaving in equally important issues as sub plots.

One such show is Yeh Pyar Na Hoga Kam (Colors) where the track is focusing on the unfair and unequal treatment that the bride’s family has to tolerate and endure. The structure of society is such around the world that women are pegged lower than men in terms of social status and hierarchy. In India there is a strong male child preference given culturally and ritually prescribed notions like the son’s right to light the funeral pyre, his sole authority to perform last rites and so on. Patriarchy, where property passes on from father to son, has helped to strengthen this system of unfair bias. Even during a marriage it is the bride’s side that has to bow down and give in to the demands of the groom’s side, no matter how unfair these are.

Rashmi and Madhav are in love and have decided to tie the knot. They belong to two different caste groups and also come from different linguistic background. Madhav’s parents unhappy with the match have been unkind and disrespecting to Rashmi’s parents from day one. Madahv’s mother especially has been cruelty personified. She has used every opportunity to belittle Rashmi’s parents, using barbed comments to hurt and wound. Madhav’s mother is so caught up with her power as the ‘groom’s mother’ that she has not stopped to consider how her behaviour affects her son’s happiness. The final straw in all her evil schemes was when she refused to let the bride’s family perform any ritual according to their own tradition.

The final obstacle will come in the way of the demand for dowry that she will put forward. Reshmi’s family has stood by mutely with folded hands accepting every taunt and insult with tears and pleas of understanding. This is drama, but there are thousand families across India who would have experienced a similar situation during the time of a daughter’s marriage. Women in their different forms-mother, wife, daughter, sister, friend- are one half of the population and the pivots of families. Isn’t it time we stop harassing them and their family members all in the name of tradition and custom? Isn’t it time to change for the better?